Aw....*^_^* This is so sweet:) .....or not:-p

Originally posted by Joseph L. Kilbreth on Tuesday, December 5, 2006 at 6:04pm

This is a reposting of an old blog from several years ago on Facebook and has not been proof-read or edited, so keep this in mind as you read typos and culturally late items. Thanks for reading!

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You know, I've been reading all those "What every guy should do for his girl" and "what girls should do for their guy" and all that fuzzies junk, and I really have to be honest. The plethra of notes, facebook groups, and quotes that are dedicated to this subject are really a little too high school for me.

When you think about it, what gives some single, lonely, chivalrous guy the right to tell all other guys that they should be more like him because he treats women correctly and with respect? Or what about the broken-hearted girl who got mixed up with a guy who just wanted sex, and she was forced to dump him? Should she start a chain note or facebook group just because she thinks she knows the standard to which every male in the world must hold himself to just so that she'll have more dating options?

Sure, some of the things listed are what guys and girls should think about doing, but not because some crazy self-righteous guy or girl starts a facebook group and gets all the "awwwwww"'s from the opposite sex for it.

I'm sorry, but Facebookers today are getting so caught up in the fuzzies and the actions of their significant other that they forget some underlying, undetectable characteristics that are only discernable through time and getting to know someone. Such as:

Girls, should a guy hold the door open for you? "Of course!" you say. Okay, I'll agree with that. But why? Why should he do that? Because you can't open it for yourself? Because women are better than men? Because guys should treat women with respect? You may or may not agree with one or more of those reasons, but the underlying idea has not been realized.

Guys, should your girlfriend restrain herself from going through your list of text messages on your phone? "Yeah! She should never do something like that!" Okay, but why? Why should she not do that? Because it's rude to do that? Because you'd never cheat on her, but she still should respect your privacy? Because you should be honest enough with her that she doesn't have to suspect anything? Which one is the good reason why she shouldn't do that?

The point I'm trying to drive at, is that IT'S NOT THE VISIBLE THINGS THAT THE BOYFRIEND OR GIRLFRIEND SHOULD BE LOOKING FOR IN THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHER! It's their heart! And how do you know someone's heart? They tell you, right? Wrong. The only way to get to know someone, and what they want and need is to be around them. Make him/her a part of your life. Make them an IMPORTANT part of your life. Not the center of your universe, just a big chunk of it.

Yes, many girls may like their boyfriend to hold open the door, to watch the occasional chick flick, to deal with her period. But is that why you love your boyfriend? It shouldn't be. You should love him because you love him!
Yes, guy want their girl to let him have space, to let him have his geeky moment and hang with his friends that she just doesn't relate to as well as he does, but is that why you love her? NO! You should love her because you love her! Not because of something he/she does or doesn't do for you, but because TRUE LOVE IS NOT REACTIVE! It does not depend on what kind of person they are, It depends on what kind of person YOU are.

When I tell my Sarah that I love her, it's not because she's kind to me. It's not because she's sweet and considerate. It's not because she's beautiful. It's not because she does "the little things." True, my Sarah is all those things, but that's not why I love her. They just make it easy for me to LIKE her.

No, I love my Sarah because I choose to. I know what she likes/dislikes because I choose to invest in her life and getting to know her. And I know what she likes because SHE TELLS ME. Not because I had to track down her facebook groups that give some crazy list of what I should do because I'm a guy with a girlfriend. My Sarah is unique. She is not like "every girl." She has her own special likes and dislikes, and I take much pleasure in learning them, because I choose to. Not because of anything she can give me or do for me (and believe me, she has more to offer than any girl I could dream up), but because I have a love that originates from God, that doesn't wait for the other person to be "worth it" or to show some kind of characteristic that appeals to me.

This, I think, is what all couples need to do for their loved one. THEN, all that other stuff like good communication, "the little things", and the fuzzies just simply because a natural byproduct of decisions (and emotions) to love the other person.

Joe Legal vs. Jose Illegal

Thought this was interesting...

Here is an example of why hiring illegal aliens is not economically productive for the State of California...

You have 2 families..."Joe Legal" and "Jose Illegal". Both families have 2 parents, 2 children and live in California.

"Joe Legal" works in construction, has a Social Security Number, and makes $25.00 per hour with payroll taxes
deducted....

"Jose Illegal" also works in construction, has "NO" Social Security Number, and gets paid $15.00 cash "under the table".

Joe Legal...$25.00 per hour x 40 hours = $1000.00 per week, $52,000 per year.

Now take 30% away for state federal tax...Joe Legal now has $31,231.00.

Jose Illegal...$15.00 per hour x 40 hours $600.00 per week = $31,200.00 per year.
Jose Illegal pays no taxes...
Jose Illegal now has $31,200.00

Joe Legal pays Medical and Dental Insurance with limited coverage $1000.00 per month $12,000.00 per year.
Joe Legal now has $19,231.00.

Jose Illegal has full Medical and Dental coverage through the state and local clinics at a cost of $0.00 per year.
Jose Illegal still has $31,200.00.

Joe Legal makes too much money is not eligible for Food Stamps or welfare.
Joe Legal pays for food $1,000.00 per month = $12,000.00 per year.
Joe Legal now has $7,231.00.

Jose Illegal has no documented income and is eligible for Food Stamps and Welfare.
Jose Illegal still has $31,200.00.

Joe Legal pays rent of $1,000.00 per month = $12,000.00 per year.
Joe Legal is now in the hole... minus (-) $4,769.00

Jose Illegal receives a $500 per month Federal rent subsidy
Jose Illegal pays rent $500.00 per month = $6,000.00 per year.
Jose Illegal still has $25,200.00

Joe Legal now works overtime on Saturdays or gets a part time job after work.

Jose Illegal has nights and weekends off to enjoy with his family.

Joe Legal's and Jose Illegal's children both attend the same school.
Joe Legal pays for his children's' lunches while Jose Illegal's children get a government sponsored lunch.

Jose Illegal's children have an after school ESL program. Joe Legal's children go home.

Joe Legal and Jose Illegal both enjoy the same Police and Fire Services, but Joe paid for them and Jose did not pay.

Also consider the fact that there are some illegal immigrants/aliens that "buy" a Social Security Number illegally from American frauds who sell them. Those immigrants/aliens use those Social Security Numbers to get "legit" jobs. Those illegal immigrants/aliens get a job that pays (for example) 40k annually. Social Security is taken out of these "legit" incomes. These Social Security witholdings total about 60,000,000,000.00 annually. Because the identity of these illegal immigrants/aliens cannot be reconciled to their actual identity, those SS witholdings ARE NEVER COLLECTED. Where does this money go? It goes one of two places: It is absorbed into the national debt, or In the event of notional budget overflow, the money is held indefinitely until such time as national debt occurs, or budget changes are made that require this money.

In short, the government is making an average of $60 BILLION off of illegal immigrants/aliens every year!!!!!

Please take into consideration these statements before voting for/supporting any governmental leadership that would support illegal immigrants/aliens.

Folks, there's a right way and a wrong way to be an American. Granted, the process of becoming an American needs a LOT of work, and it is a tedious (and sometimes ridiculous) undertaking, but you don't rob a bank to make a living do you? So why cheat the citizens of America (and possibly yourself) by supporting those in power (or potentially in power) that would allow such things to occur?

p.s. A BIG "congratulations" to my friend, Jose G. and my other friends who have suffered the process of becoming an American the proper way. You guys (and gals) rock! You'll make better American than most of us!






just a thought:)A Little over the top, but thought-provoking.

I shall call him...mini-"G"

So, I was watching Private Practice (in truth, it was on TV and I was barely paying attention) when I heard a character make the comment that while she didn't believe in God, even if she did, she couldn't believe that God would allow her mom to suffer a painful, drawn out death via brain tumor.

I can't tell you how many times I've heard people make comments just like this one. "I don't believe in a god who sends people to hell," "I don't want to believe in a god that lets millions of African children die of starvation," and "I don't believe in a god that [doesn't fit the description I have in my mind]" are just a few comments I've heard.

While (1) God doesn't send anyone to hell--Acts 16:30-31, Genesis 4:17 & 3:17 etc. and (2) God doesn't cause famine from spite--Genesis 3:17, Mark 6:41-42, the bigger question is:

WHO ARE WE TO SAY WHO GOD IS AND ISN'T OR WHAT HE IS/ISN'T LIKE?

It sounds like these people are creating a god IN THEIR OWN IMAGE. Last time I checked, the Bible was the source that states who God is. It defines Him by His actions and words.

Consider these statements:
1. The God of the Bible is the Creator of EVERYTHING.
2. This same God exercises sovereignty (meaning complete control and power) over His creation.

Now, if you believe both of the above statements, then the following statement must also be true: God can do whatever He wants, whenever He wants, to whomever He wants, with or without anyone else's permission or approval. Now, if all three of these statements are true, then why do people who claim to be Christian (and Christ claimed that He Himself was God in John 1:1,14 & 10:30) say and/or think things like those original statements? It seems like too many people want to make God a mini-me version that they've conceived in their own mind, rather than looking to Scripture to get a true definition of who He is...

"Why?"

The following is a repost of a previously written blog dated September 1, 2010:



I'm quickly realizing that the reason soldiers get the stereotype of being dumb is because many times they're denied the opportunity to be anything else.

Too many times, I've heard the phrase "If you don't know something, just ask." That question should be followed quickly with "Just don't ask me a question that begins with 'why'. The job I do in the Army presents a HUGE learning curve for me. Not only am I new to the Army, but I'm working mainly with people who are much, much more familiar with the tasks, processes, and knowledge associated with years of experience. While there are good days and bad days, most of my frustration stems from a lack of understanding of the reasons WHY things are the way they are.

You can give a soldier an M16, tell him to aim at a target, and he'll pull the trigger. But what happens when his weapon jams? If he doesn't know why the weapon works the way it does or what's causing the issue, he's not going to know how to fix the problem!

There are two approaches to this situation from the trainer's perspective: 1) Tell the soldier what to do next, or 2) teach the soldier how the weapon works in the first place (essentially telling him WHY the weapon works). Now, which approach do you think would work best? I submit that a deeper understanding will always foster creative thinking, faster arrival at solutions, more reliable retention of those solutions, and in the case of the Army, very possibly prevent unnecessary loss of life.

In BCT, I was quickly taught how to perform remedial action on a malfunctioning M16. What I was not taught until much later was WHY I was doing it. I actually remember having to ask WHY I had to drop the magazine before recycling the chamber!

Today, in my job, I am very interested in what I do. I like working in communications. However, many times, when I try to gain a deeper understanding of WHY the communications network is the way it is, I am very often met with replies similar to "Oh, don't worry about that. All you need to know is this..." And yet, I am hypocritically encouraged that "If you don't know something, just ask!"

It is the "why" questions that often separate intellects from troglodytes. And this is why many soldiers (who may or may not have already been the dumb brutes that some people think they are) inevitably turn into the stereotypical know-nothings that I fear I will someday become, should I remain in the Army; the ones that actually want to know WHY things are the way they are, are shut down, ridiculed, and shunned from the "high speed" soldier cliques.

Now, in an extreme sense, of course I can't expect to know EVERYTHING about the Army. Even the President doesn't know everything about what and WHY the Army's doing everything it's doing. There's an unavoidable need for security with much of the Army's overall objectives. To quote Presidential Candidate John McCain in the Presidential Debates: "Maybe, but you don't say that out loud!"
But I don't ask questions to which I know I'm not entitled the answer, or at least I try not to.

I'm not talking about those situations though. I'm referring to the underlying denial of the opportunity to pursue a deeper understanding of one's own job in the Army. I spoke with an NCO who recently told me that if he doesn't know the answer to a question, he'd find out and let me know. Unfortunately, he's subscribed to the idea that if it doesn't help you complete the task at hand, it's not worth asking or investigating.

There's a reason that every time I've written the word WHY in this essay I've done so in all CAPS. It's to emphasize my frustration, petition, and I dare say, demand that other soldiers in the Army require a better reason why their superiors deny them the expansion of their own knowledge.

In closing, I have four suspicions as to why this problem exists:

First, there's the cop-out reason that the inquiring soldier is on a need-to-know basis and doesn't need to know. This is a cheap, cowardly response that should not be shared or propagated by anyone who calls him/herself a leader of soldiers.
Second, the reason some supervisors don't answer these questions from their inferiors is because THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW THE ANSWER. This is probably due to the fact that THEIR superiors didn't know either, and never taught them. This is self-evident proof that this problem is self-sustaining and self-propagating. All I have to say to that is danger Will Robinson, danger.
Third, because some leaders are afraid that if someone appears to be questioning the way things are done, that they might actually come under review and (Allah help us,) THINGS MIGHT CHANGE!!!!!!
Lastly, the reason these questions are not answered might be because the ultimate end to the path of asking WHY questions will lead the inquirer to discover that (yes, I'm going to say it), the Army does not have the answers to everything. No, the Army is not the end-all source of knowledge and truth in the universe.

For your own sake and that of your sanity and intelligence, please assist me in producing an unrelenting intolerance of the refusal to answer your WHY questions. Otherwise, you're just a replaceable asset to the war machine, and you, the inquirer will have to live with your decisions.


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'Til Death Do Us Part...Before Taxes

Do you, husband/wife, VOW to marry this woman/man, to love them until they continually annoy you? Do you VOW to stay with them so long as they don't get too sick for too long? Do you VOW to love him/her so long as they only spend as much money as you think is appropriate and don't accumulate any more debt than you deem appropriate? Do you VOW to stay faithful to them until someone hotter or more attractive shows up? Do you VOW to stay with them as long as you think it's a good idea? Do you VOW to keep yourself only for them and all the porn stars you'll watch whenever you aren't dedicated enough to focus your desires on your spouse?
Do you so VOW? Yes? Then you're just like over 70% of American marriages today.

Maybe it's just me, but when did marriage become a contract and not a commitment? When were vows replaced with bargains, and devotion replaced with interest?

It seems to me that far too many people take their car loan more seriously than their marriage. Seriously, people. If you can't keep your wedding vows--the most solemn, sacred, and serious promise a person could make--then how could anything you say, do, or promise in life be taken seriously?

And what of remarriage after divorce? Depending on the reasons for the divorce, how is the second spouse going to react to you saying the same vows to them that you said to someone else? How is the whole "'til death do us part" bit going to go over when you dropped your last mate because they put on some extra pounds over the years and weren't as attractive as they were on that first date? And what about the "for better of worse" part? Think you're second wife/husband will believe you when you promise that, even though you divorced your last partner because they spent too much money or got you in debt?

And what does the Bible have to say about divorce?
Malachi 2:16: “I hate divorce, says the LORD God of Israel.”
Matthew 19:6 & 8: “So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate” "Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning.""
Matthew 5:32: "But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery"

Some understand 1 Corinthians 7:15 ("But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace.") as an “exception,” allowing remarriage if an unbelieving spouse divorces a believer. However, the context does not mention remarriage, but only says a believer is not bound to continue a marriage if a non-Christian spouse wants to leave. Others claim that abuse (spousal or child) is a valid reason for divorce even though it is not listed as such in the Bible. While this may very well be the case, it is never wise to presume upon the Word of God.

Here's the difference that many people miss: Marriage is a covenant, not a contract. It is a commitment, not a commencement. When I got up on the platform in that church in front of all those people and my future wife, I didn't say "I promise to stay married to you until you do (this), or so long as you don't do (that)."
Here's what I said (in so many words): "Sarah, I promise to stay true to you no matter what. My love for you is not dependent on your actions. Just like Jesus loves us, I will do my utmost to love you unconditionally. Nothing you can do or not do will make me stop loving you. I am committed to you. Even if you should ever stop being committed to me, I will keep up my end of the offer."

"Aw, but Joe, you've not been through what I've been through. 'She was mean', and 'he stopped loving me'." How many times have we done the same thing to God...and how many times has He forgiven us?

A contract says "If you do X and don't do Y, I'll do Z. But as soon as you don't hold up your end of the bargain, I'm gone!"
A covenant says: "Nothing can separate you from my love. I will love you for better or for worse; I will love you even when I don't feel like it; Even if you fail to keep your end of the promise, I will keep mine. I will love you even you don't like me, or when you make me mad, or do something wrong." Because after all, we're going to mess up eventually and need forgiveness too...

Ephesians 4:32:"Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you."

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Guess I'll have to explain this...

Well, here's my best attempt at a blog. I've had them before, but I wanted to take this one a bit more seriously.

The words Cheoil Saighdiuiri are Gaelic for "Musical Soldier" as reflected in my blog title. I'm only Scott/Irish by ancestry, but I've always loved the sound of Gaelic. And if you're wondering how it's pronounced, in IPA, it's:

This means that it's pronounced "koh-il sahk-JOOR-ih-ree." 

Well, enough of that explanation. I mainly plan to use this blog for little "essays" (as I call them) and thoughts about anything and everything. However, as is the nature of internet-based rambling, I fully expect this blog to evolve a great deal beyond it's normal definition.

So, let us see what dreams may come.